Thursday, December 19, 2013

5 Possible Comebacks for "Ang Taba Mo"

I read this article on Rappler and while I think Ms. Shakira Sison did an awesome job, her essay / article just didn't give more tips to answer the remark "Ang Taba Mo". So here I am, inspired by what I read, doing an essay on my own on how to comeback from a remark like that. 

*You could say I'm a subject matter expert when it comes to this situations*
** Rather than post pics, let's go with food porn shall we?**

fried cheese sandwich

So first, a prologue, ANG TABA MO isn't where it ends. That spiral arrow of truth can come in different flavors and variants. There's the standard which is a remark, no physical changes, just saying that your fat. ANG TABA MO LALO is where it hurts. All those man or woman hours in the gym did not do squat and that vegan diet you've taken up isn't helping you (the animals maybe, but not you). 

There's also the more concealed "LUMULUSOG TAYO AH". which sounds different but still feels like you're being stabbed by Machete's favorite weapon. NAPABAYAAN KA YATA SA KUSINA - hurts like hell.


1. "Thank you. Masarap kumain eh"

It's polite and concise and you're telling the truth. Add a smile to this to look like a saint despite the fact that you feel like you want to pull out a grenade and send yourself and that other person to fitness heaven. 

2. "Weh?"

Bacon... in hi-res

It's a sign that you're in denial and candid about it. The payoff comes off on how you deliver "weh". A weh with a guttural snarl means that you're hurt and playing it cool. A "weh di nga" is exasperation and disbelief. A sarcastic "weh" might just be the middle ground for this. 

3. "Ang _________ mo naman" 

I have no words for this. nor a witty caption. 
Depending on the situation, you can fill in the blanks with a different adjective. If its a relative make them feel good by saying they look young or fresh. If it's a feeling-close colleague in the office, deal moderate damage and if it's your hated enemy, try something heavier, something that will make them want to skip breakfast.and lunch. and possible medya noche. You can even tell the truth. If payat, then say it, fight fire with fire or at least fight brutal honesty with brutal honesty.

4. "Ikaw din"

Goose liver and pancakes

Boomerang the comment right back at them and see yourself enter an awkward situation. It's a bit of suicide run but at least you'll never hear them blurt that out again. You might even have them questioning themselves. Bonus points if you see them look at the mirror trying to see if your words ring true. 

5. "Ganun talaga e" 

Pork Knees
Acceptance is better than shrugging it off. The years will add pounds and flab. By saying ganun talaga its like saying nature has run it's course and you have embraced that idea. Two additional things for this, you either walk away from person or you add something, anything. You can say that you're still heading to the gym or that you're doing boxing or yoga or training to powerlift. Just be honest. 

This one is called THOR. Seriously

That's it. All that food porn that went along with this post just made me hungry. Have a happy holiday ahead of you dear reader. 

No comments:

Post a Comment